Fairy Tale-ish Christmas

Well… I seem to have “lost” the original writing of this below post. I was trying to be tech savvy and restore new iPad from old iPad and POOF! there goes the most epic first post for a blog possible. Here’s to hoping this rendition is as funny as I thought I was in the last writing.. (btw, has anyone ever listened to Tribute by Tenacious D? This is what they felt like.. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_lK4cX5xGiQ).

The 3 amigos set out on a wonderful… no, magical... Christmas adventure to Switzerland. Sure, we weren’t the homiest of homies, but despite being nervous about how the trip would go, it ended up being AMAZING & quite hilarious if you ask any of us.

Here’s the few things Josh, Sara and I learned on this wee weekend excursion:

1. Always bring Dramomine.. There’s always one person who gets motion sickness at the slightest things, like turning a direction to fast.
2. 25 is hard, avoid carnival rides.. ALL carnival rides.
3. Food is required before any in-motion activities; mulled wine does not count as food despite what you want to believe.
4. Tinder is great for meeting new people.. people willing to describe, show and let you touch their shlong.
5. Switzerland thinks their trains are made of gold.. find discounts beforehand or consider your right arm as collateral.
6. When traveling in a group, your bowel movements seem to become a popular talking topic.. especially pooping.
7. When you have to poop, everyone is genuinely happy for you.
8. Have pre-wingman sit down prior to going on a tinder meet up with a ginger otherwise they will get sudden diarrhea of the mouth about how much they hate gingers…awkward, fast.
9. When packing ensure your shoes are more shoe not holes… this makes for frozen feet, the entire trip.
10. It is possible to eat 7 countries worth of food.
11. Lastly, when staying at fine establishments, such as hostels, the cheap-o’s you meet are great. Especially Kiwi’s who think their tramp stamp is more like a tramp tapestry.. it was large.. and ridiculous (she was a hoot!).

In closing, we are now what some may call legit friends. Like, we sit with each other at lunch instead of ignoring one another in public. Josh bought shoes without holes, pretty sure exact same shoes, typical man. Sara still hates gingers. I bought value size of knock off Dramomine. All of us ready for the next adventure!

Stay tuned readers.

Shout out to Ostello Bello Grande Hostel in Milan. Go to Milano. Stay there. AWESOME! Also, to all the new homies we made on this little excursion.